remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
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