And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
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