I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
third nipple confirmed
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
It's not a walk of shame if you run
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