also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
