do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
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