I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
