As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
She's like a pop up book from hell.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
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