I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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