Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
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