i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
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