thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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