About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
