he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
When are your genitals available?
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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