Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
