Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize