Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Randomize
