and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
