Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
Randomize
