More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Randomize