I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
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