How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
