just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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