What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
