shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
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