quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
Randomize
