fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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