on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
Randomize