So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Randomize
