awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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