We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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