There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize
