ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
