I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize
