someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Randomize
