GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
