oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Randomize
