Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Randomize
