im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
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