question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Randomize
