I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Randomize