i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
zippers are such a cool invention
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Randomize