he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
