Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Randomize
