Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
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