I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize