dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
We left an ass print on the piano.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
