Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Randomize
