id be glad to
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Randomize
