Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
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