Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
